Five years ago

25 July 2000, Tuesday, 0846hr
Day 43 in Cambodia

At LD's place having breakfast now. As usual, in the past 6 days, many things happened. I can cycle! At least balance, but still can't turn. :(

.... ... ... ...

Yest while we were going out for dinner with the field director, etc (whoever), supposed to wait for Js. Where we were supposed to wait for them, there were police doing inspection, along the road, doing body search, holding rifles. It was a little scary waiting there. Actually not scary, but you will feel concerned. Was praying half the time for safety...

In the meantime, saw a mother squatting by the side of a photo shop, with her baby asleep on the floor. I was commenting to AR abt d guy, in front of us who was munching on a 'nom-pang' (bread)that its prob his dinner, and how blessed we are. He was saying tong2 ren2 bu4 tong2 ming4. Which was absolutely true. Wat's d only diff? The diff is where you are born in. There are so many more out there. Am I just going to settle for wat i have while many others are out there suffering? What if Jesus had decided to stay in His own glorious heaven and not come down as a lowly baby?

Then practical thots come along. THots abt yah, spend a few yrs in d mission field, then wat? COmpetition in Spore wld have made me'obsolete'. Maybe work a few yrs, gather some experience as a safety net? Actually, in the first place, I have made education my safety net already. How many safety nets do I need? Isn't the Lord more than sufficient? ...
...

Yi-hee. yest AR & Vim/CO were saying they'll give me an "A" for my khmer considering d fact I was here for only 1 mth plus & without a teacher. But I know it is of an d from the Lord, with all the prayers. If not, dun tink i can move so quickly. :) Can get a little scary sometimes when emailing or wirting stuff, will tink of typing/writing d khmer words.

Sok Mean gave me a little heart which says Just for You on Sunday. So cute & so sweet. :) Chaya passed me foto we took tog. so nice of him to rem. Can still rem how he wanted the nice bkgrd behind us, then pose, then no negative!! hee hee. Received a little from .... yest. Very interesting letter. Shall end here. Tired already. :)

0916hr

going thro the motions....

been v tired over d week. so how i lived was just going thro the motions... moving from point a to b, going thro some usual motions, den from b to c.... while going thro these motions, some of the things which happened:

1. realization tt national day hol (for two days) are ruined. last min informed tt pple like me hv to accompnay kids to some 'do your community some good' performance over the national day eve and the PH itself. like FULL day stuff tt ends at nite. consolation, at least my kids were quite enthusiatic abt tt stuff... so its like more worthwhile burning the two days. just irritated abt the 'seemingly-efficient' 'high and mighty ones' who can only arrow and deprive their bonded slaves of their rest so LAST MINUTE.

2. surprised tt despite being tired and running thro the motions, i'm able to during a class itself come up w something fun for kids (cos they really look like they need to be kept them alive and awake). the method itself i thot was effective and fun in teaching the drawing of diagrams. so... wow. not going thro the motions afterall - during that session.

3. my PE boss told me she's excited abt speaking to my P abt introducing diving as an enrichment so we might have something interesting to get into media. and could be pushing for like overseas trip - more than wat i had been asking for - just a discovery session. but alas... P's been too busy to speak to her, and this boss is leavig soon..

4a. juz witnessed an old pal's wedding today. happy for him. :) at the same time, met up w some old jc frens. was feeling anti-social at first. later, circumstance forced me to open up and engage in some small talk for a while. all was good.

4b. cannot stand wat the pastor was speaking during the exhortation. being insensitive, and i tink biblically unsound, he said... pple 'pi4 xu1' (MUST/NEED TO) find a second half, pple 'pi4 xu1' leave parents and start a new family... com'on. its good for that to happen and i truly believe that. but doesn't mean if that doesn't happen it makes anyone incomplete. Apostle Paul spoke abt how if u dun hv the 'need/urge' to engage in this sortof commitment, den its better u stay that way to serve GOd better. everytime he went into the 'pi4 xu1' i just turned to my fren and gave her the... 'i'm so walking out of here' expression and we laughed. lol.
also... wat kind of analogy is 'marriage is like coffee. when u order coffee from coffee shop, u dun tell the person i wan coffee with sugar and milk. it comes with it. marriage of two persons is like the 'coffee with sugar and milk.. they are integrated together.'...... ...... ....... ...... lol

5. finally got my hands on starwars!!! AH HA HA HA. am gonna watch that soon. :)

6. another boo boo happened. but i cannot be bothered to expound on it.

7. brought gals sailing. a little disappointed i cldn't join them for the 7-session course cos of another project in aug. but had a really good time interacting with them during the process.

8. had a terrible dream tt kept me tired. i dreamt i was working til like 4am. and i was like... oh no have to get up at 5am, must try to work faster so i can sleep. and i finished my work at 4.45am. only 15 mins to sleep before getting up for school. it was then i woke up. as in really wake up. but the feeling is... i hvn't slept a wink, because the dream was so real. humbug.

meanwhile, i'm gonna go snooze n go for jazz by the beach tonite. FINALLY! :) still going thro the motions a bit...

caffienated giraffe

did not sleep last nite. because stupid me drank lodsa coke. bought 1.5l of coke on sat to satisfy my craving on fri nite. drank and darnk yest happily at nite, forgetting that... it... has.. loads... of... caffiene.

frustrating day. handling 'very-concerned' parent who doesn't consider the bigger picture, brining the matter up to my P and VP. so wasted time handling something which, cld be settled in a much shorter time if she had called me direct instead.

racial harmony day celebration in sch today. so i wore my sarong kebaya. FINALLY. so i've donned punjabi, cheongsam, sari, and sarong kebaya oredi. just finding a chance to wear my vietnamese ao yai i tailor made 5 years ago before i become too fat for it. (its tailormade see..)

and i just BOOed again. got the date i'm sending my gals to do community performance wrong. like i kept thinking i told the lady its 28th, but she was expecting us on 21st. @#$#&*(@ yeah. tink i've just created a new verb in vocabulary for pple like me. BOO - (v) doing something really stupid without knowing until its almost too late, or simply too late. typically an action carried out by scatterbrains.

just wrote a super long letter to starhub expressing my disappointment with the provider. was like irritated but hopeful6 they cld do something abt my situation last tues. was damn pissed off yesterday. called them up today. had a nice chap on d fon, nice, but cant do anything to help my situation. so i just shot a nice long letter to feedback how they will be losing a customer (in two years lah, cos i'm stuck) because of how the situation was dealt with.

tis week is gonna be a long one in whcih i will leave work late everyday. didn't start off rested or prepared for this week. but watever, things are not rosy, but they are not bad. so just live on... anywayz, its just temproal. there are more impt things.

and oh yes J, there's like NO DETAILS. because we only exchanged a couple of smses. and tt's like so enough to turn me super duper off, with the exception that it makes an interesting conversation topic w my pals and we can all laugh at it. u need strange things like that in life. :) and of course, ana felt REALLY BAD about it. *laughs* tt otta teach her a lesson to try to do things like that. *chuckles*

*waiting for bedtime to crash*

always look on the bright siiide of life... *whistle*

spent the ENTIRE day on course on a Saturday.

music course. looking on the bright side of life:
- someone told me someone said tt i'm hot. ah ha ha.
- i was on a super 'winning' streak. one of the activities - bingo. i had like a double bingo! and then, i 'won' a music activity book during a session from a 'lucky draw'. LN cldn't believe his luck, sitting beside me and watching me win all the stuff. *laughs*

well... but missed jazz by the beach. :( after a lot of 'misses' of pple who agreed to go w me, but pulled out like... one a week ago, another one two days ago, another one just today. was too tired to go alone. may try that next week.

meanwhile something REALLY interesting. Ana tried to hook me up like with her fren's son sort of thing. it hilarious. but i agreed to let her for the fun of it (more for HER fun cos she's been bugging me real long). i mean, absolutely NO OBLIGATIONS and no harm done. but this guy.. man he's a weirdo!! like among his first few sms-es were like... "are you a catholic?"; "did anyone mention to you that i'm a 'pious' catholic?"; "which church are you from?" MY GOSH!! U THINK WAT? I WAN TO MARRY YOU!?!? like or... I HAVE TO BE MS PERFECT? oh.. MS GODLY to be a fren? i mean... i understd when pple are concerned abt religion. hey i am too! but i dun go round telling pple i'm a 'staunch' christian and am only interested in like.. holy pple? wat is this? some holy moley thing? SPARE ME! BUT its really worth a laugh. :)

anywayz, sailing is struck off my list now because of other work commitments. so... not too bad. maybe i can finally slowly lose my tan before i get another one end of the year. :)

and cheers to all the weird, unattached pple.. and the hot ;) unattached pple... LOL.... sorriez... still amused. *chuckles*

happy auntie giraffe

after a long week, and long day today, i've called it quits and took a cab home as early as i could today. wat awaited me was something very pleasant.

BOTH my sisters and cutie nephews were home!!!! its the first time ever i see the two cuties together. first thing i did was to whip out the camera and started shooting them tog. heh. and i had fun w the elder one, who's only 1 year plus.

really nice.... :) but still exhausted. wld oredi b concuzzed an hour ago had it not been for those handsome boys... :)

At Looooooooong Last...

I went running!!!

It was the usual 3km run. But I took 3 minutes longer. Drats.

Den went to buy chocolate bar, wafers, choc chip cookies. Sadly, not for my consumption. Using it to teach weathering this week. Mua ha ha... how to teach weathering w that? Use ur imagination and try to guess. I might just pass u one choc chip cookie if u guess correctly. *laughs*

Hope i'll run again

Taken from June 30, 2005

The Power of a Transcendent Life
by Francis Frangipane
Frangipane Ministries, Inc.

There are a great many books written today about developing our
spiritual gifts or discovering our purpose . . . most of them are
absolutely worthy of our attention. Recognizing our gifts and being
trained to serve God in our individual calling is part of doing His
will. Yet, there is a deeper, more essential goal -- an objective that
is ultimately far more valuable both to God and ourselves. I am talking
about the genuine quest to possess the likeness of Christ.

To seek spiritual fulfillment
from "our ministry" or "gifting" is to walk a path that actually leads
away from the fulfillment.

A "calling" or task may be to serve as a pastor or teacher or a
housewife or in the marketplace, but regardless of my outward
responsibilities, my core destiny -- the reality that continues
unfolding within me regardless of outward circumstances -- is to
embrace a life "conformed to the image of [God's] Son."

You see, our destiny is not what we do for God, but who we become to
Him. As we reach for Christlikeness, our love for God becomes richer,
our witness to sinners more powerful, and our secret life holy. As we
seek conformity to Jesus, we discover that all our spiritual desires
are rooted and nourished by conformity to Him.

The fact that the gifts and calling of God operate somewhat independent
of our character tell us that God will use imperfect people. But we
still must beware. A day may come when we look to our gifts or ministry
and plead, "Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your
name cast out demons, and in Your name perform many miracles?" But
Christ will not have it.

Instead, He will utter those most terrible words, "I never knew you;
depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness" (Matt 7:21-23).

You see, our gifts are necessary and understanding our calling is
vital. Yet, attaining the nature of Christ is our destiny.

Beloved, as we approach the end of the age, a new priority is coming to
God's people: the summing up of "all things in Christ" (see Eph
1:9-10). Both our gifts and our calling must serve our destiny, which
is to reveal the nature of Christ. The focus that brings meaning and
fulfillment is that which works to conform us inwardly to Christ. Our
lives are to become "a fragrance of Christ to God" (2 Cor 2:15). Yes,
the path to Christlikeness is the way to transcendent life of God.

Transcendance between two countries...

i went shopping in jb... with my dad.... yeah. my dad. no one could make it down (it was a pretty last min decision). i was all ready to go on my own cos need to get some shoes. and since my dad also happen to be going, we decided to go tog. (note: my dad doesn't shop. his... the... asian... dad). in the end, he did his stuff, i did mine and we met up later. :)

anywayz,some interesting things:

1. I saw quite a lot of st. johns boys n gals selling flags. (not quite flags, just with boxes for u to donate money). interesting point: the location. they were standing just BESIDE all the little immigration booths for both the entry AND exit points. honestly, singapore will not agree to this COMPLETELY. i'm not for or against this. just an interesting note from a local (institutioned) educator's point of view.

2. why is it pple claim that our country is more efficient, but our immigration neva live up to that name? most of the time, if not always when i cross the borders, i usually end up taking a significantly longer time at our end... then the other end. i cld pass the immigration that quickly, only to find myself stuck in my homeland's fence. vice versa. today, on the bike, same thing, to and fro. well, it cld b the security thing, it cld also be there are less counters open at our end. watever it is, doesn't matter, just an observation. :)

3. while stuck with 99% of the gender with the XY chromosones just outside the road leading to the immigration booths, i saw an interesting conversation struck up when one guy (the DOM type of look) with another when the former's scoot cldn't start up. its interesting to feel the tension... the interflux of intense competition (trying to get next in line) and the slight wavers of human kindness (when u see pple smile, or simply show some nuances of expression overhearing that conversation).

4. Barney speaks Malay!! (in Giant supermart)... urm... pun intended. *laughs*

Ok. I'm pretty tired. along the way, i had the time to tink of the things that are in my portfolio in the weeks to come. *shuddrs*. but i will NOT WORK TODAY!!! and start mugging tom.. hehz....

oh, and i got 3 pairs of shoes and 3 tops (one from a Mango sale, which is definitely a more humanizing experience than that of singapore's!!)

Top 10 Yeahs & Bleahs of my Panasonic

Yeahs
1. I can fwd a sms to multiple recipients FOR THE FIRST TIME (i tink. will test the function out later).
2. its red.
3. the sms-ing keys are almost the same as that of samsung. so dun hv to encounter much changes in adapting than if i had changed to a nokia)
4. the alarm actually still works even if i turn off the fon!!! (unlike my previous samsung)
5. cooler game than samsung (if othello counts. we are talking abt RELATIVITY here)
6. its red
7. its one of the smaller fons ard in the mkt now. (fons are pretty huge now)
8. its got camera and recorder function, not like i use it. tink the mpix is small, if i'm not wrong.
9. dunno abt memory space. but quite big? (compared to old samsung again)
10. its red

bleahs
1. bleah ringtones
2. bleah msg tones
3. bleah and few choices of ring and msg tones
4. softest volume chosen is still pretty loud
5. no spare batt
6. u cannot find a contact no. easily. it only brings u to the first alphabet of the name, thereafter, happy scrolling
7. its not a clamshell
8. calender function sucks - u can record ur schedule. BUT it only shows the list of activities... and do not reflect the activities if u just scroll to the date itself. wats the point when u hv to check if u are free on THAT date?
9. its not a clamshell
10. and "BESTEST" of all best... its got jay chou's faces in some of the options for wallpaper.... SAVE ME!!!!

Still getting to noe my little red fren....

and of course, i still hvn't touched my work review and its so gonna be overdue by tom.....

i just finished a book in 4 hours...

thanks to EC who shoved Every Boy's One by Meg Cabot to me on Sun despite i telling her i wanna finish another book (which i did in 2 days)... i've been crazy....

anywayz, this book is not as interesting as the first one i read by Meg.... still entertaining.. and i can return it before its overdue and dear EC gets fined...

when actually I SHLD BE DOING MY WORK REVIEW cos its kindof overdue soon.. CHONG EC!!!!....

in any case, she just stopped me from watching CSI... lol.... siao cha bor.. and she's holding on the fon waiting for me to blog this now... ah ha ha ha....

we are both crazy....

change? experiment?

I just got a new mobile. Its a RED panasonic sliding fon. I've finally gotten my red fon. dun get me wrong. i love white fons. my previous 3 fons were white.. but somehow... they get yellowish and dun look as nice after a while. red.. is a nice change. i used to go with samsung... despite it failing me time and time again... but now decided to go with panasonic, because samsung just did not hv the clamsheel i've always adored since day 1, and sitll adore. and yes... speaking of clamshell... i told pple... i will neva get sliding... i stick to clamshell.. sadly there are no decent clamshells ard (nokia has improved on their clamshell.. but still too bulky.. and well.. its nokia)..... so... the next best is the red sliding.. .lol

i hope it works out. haven't tested the sound yet. shall wait till tom when its fully charged

in any case... took longer than expected to get the fon. thot i'll head home from parkway after church... but no.... ended up in PS.... thot i'll leave at 5 to catch Minority Report.. but no..... ended up getting EC's fon as well and watching War of the Worlds. Its scary and exciting at the begining.. but alas.... liek mr n mrs smith... enidng was..... lame....

anywayz, meet up with bui bui and EC for lunch... so was good... shopped for fon with EC. i came back with 2 and she with one.... darn tired now. trying to finish the book Backpack i started two nites ago.. before sch... i've been doing nothing but reading this book since i started... lol.... man.... must finish.. must finish.....

ok... enff updates.. hungry

For my dear ones who love me...

I feel obligated to blog a bit despite work because I noe there are those who reads my blog to check out how i am....

1 week following my break to ko samui
- its mean literally work work work.. right from i touched down changi (even in samui airport). *laughs*
- spent a day doing a field work course.. it was... ok...
- went to chekc if i qualify for lasik.. and yeah.. i'm scheduled for that in Sept!! ExCITED MAN!!
- caught up w old bro P. visited his cafe and showroom. its really nice to hear tt i'm missed... i mean.. seirously.. i'd been away from church and CG (not deliberately)... not noeing tt.. pple actually do miss me. i'm not attention-seeking here.. all im saying is.. it feels good when u realize tt pple do miss u... ke ke

today....
school reopened!!!!! *tears out hair* but honestly, it went smoother than i thot, for the first day.. so thank God.

meanwhile.. its more meetings and projects.. so i'm so looking forward to dec hols... :)

any idea

how long it takes to airmail something from Britain to Singapore?

Muaz purchased a dive rattler from ebay.... item sent on 1 Jun via airmail... still no news... dun tell me lost in mail.... no way of like getting refund? any idea anyone?

Current mood: very disappointed

tis trip...

1. was a super nuah one. for once, i dun journal my trip.
2. got my butt sunburnt from snockelling. i mean, seriously, butt burn? neva heard of it. but IT FREAKING HAPPENED TO ME. EC called me baboon thereafter.
3. managed to dive thanks to EC's pushing. always game for diving, but the thot of doing it alone, at the same time leaving her behind (but she had fun without me).
4. diving was great. hey, its rare to have an asian female going diving alone in these places and i was the only one. mua ha ha. felt weird at first. cos all ang moh ppl. buddied an english guy. EC was proud of me, said i did us asian woman proud, but just as she said that, i went 'yay' and ... tripped... wat an anticlimax. lol
5. (learnt from previous trip too).... generosity. i was brought up to be thrifty. but i've learnt... the gift of generosity and hospitality from my hosts. very touched.
6. i finished up a 'trash' book... and urm bought like 3 2nd hand books... which i tink i can only get to read next hol, next next hol, and next next next hol. lol

Finally, an interesting point to note for the benefit of my dear EC:
a snockel is not the same as a mask. ;)

cant rem the rest oredi. tt's the prob of not journaling during the trip. but good enuff. better move on to other stuff now....

buaz holidays.....

koh samui - itinerary (changing everyday)

12 Jun (Sun)
4pm - meet EC at bugis to go JB
6pm - got into a slight hassle w personnel in JB, they den sent us to Larkin. (their fault)
6.30pm - left Larkin for Hatyai

13 Jun (Mon)
Morn - reached Hatyai, get tix for Samui
Morn to afternn - SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP
Afternn to night - shop, bargain, eat (JAP!), drink, walk, shop, bargain, eat (watever), drink, walk...

14 Jun (Tues)
Morn - BF (bakkutteh)
Morn to Late evening - Travel to Samui (van, irritating wait at surat thani, ferry)
Evening to nite - washup, dinner w AR (my new fren in thaild) & frens

15 Jun (Wed)
Morn to evening - snockelling at Koh Tao & Pangyan
Nite - Dinner w AR & fren, den a nice walk by the beach.

16 Jun (Thurs)
Morn to afternn - out sightseeing w EC, AR & fren
Afternn onwards - i cant rem. but i vaguely remembered we decided to fly back and forfeit our coach tix, and i got psychoed by EC to dive the following day (ALONE!).

17 Jun (Fri)
I WENT DIVING DIVING DIVING.

18 Jun (Sat)
Morn - Spent more than an hour in the sea. EC n I went crazy doing stupid things like.... having waves crash at us, racing each other (as in running) in the sea, doing stunts (i hv yet to master doing handstands and she yet to master doing forward roll) in the water, i managed to tred water for 3 mins, back float, learning to open my eyes in the sea,..... all the while, me without my glasses....
Morn - got ousted out by our guesthouse cos they were full. so we packed and transfered to another one, with a beach with turgid water. gosh.
Afternn - Went to Nathon. Walked around. Getting bored. D
Evening - Dinner w EC, AR & fren

19 Jun (Sun)
Morn - we still did not manage to wake up to see the sunrise. wanted to swim again, but the thot of the sea with nice water so far away...
Packed and checked out.
Morn to Afternoon - walked and walked for at least 2 hours. we bought beer along the way while walking.. and the sun, the laughter, the exhaustion reduced our alchol tolerance, we got lightheaded. *laughs* but not drunk or high. just lightheaded on the street
Afternn till evening - on board i cannot rem wat flight home.

End of holiday - start of work (LITERALLY)

I only blogged tis cos i did not journal in my travel journal. if i dun blog, i will forget.

packing and packing and packing

packing has pretty much been my preoccupation lately while at home (not much anywayz).

20 may - packed for a three day dive trip 20 - 23 may.
24 May - packed for a three day S3 camp 25 - 27 may.
30 may - packed for an elevan day work trip to china 31 may - 10 jun.
12 jun - will be packing for a not sure how many days trip to koh samui 12 jun - 19 jun??

i'm actually getting quite sick of packing. almost gave up packing for my china trip. dun wanna tink of packing tom. but finally hols is beginning for me. not much left really.

given these activities, i am super chao dta now. sigh. but KOH SAMUI!!! HERE I COME!!!

There will be sightings of giraffe

in China from 31 May to 10 Jun 2005.

Go figure.

after wastage of many man-hours and countless of trees cut down for watever proposals

transport fares will rise as EXPECTED. Y kill those poor trees in the name of 'welfare' and 'justice'?

trying to blog....

currently distracted by a couple of frens msning... BUT I WANNA BLOG THIS ONE badly.. b4 the craze which has oredi started intensifies.

wat more am i gonna blog abt but my DIVE TRIP!!! *chuckles*

SOP: meet fri 7.30pm, reach mersing 12am, boat ride to dayang/aur ETA 5/6am.

This trip: meet fri 7.30pm, reach mersing 12.30am, stuck in mersing till 6am, approx arrival in aur 11+am.

WAT HAPPENED?!? silly 'resort' owner did not fix the small boat transfer out of mersing... w low tide, means we ALL GOT STUCK for hours. sleeping at the open jetty, with cold hard chairs (not to mention dirty) and MOZZIES... is difficult. no, cut out the sleeping part. boat ride was one of the more comfy cos it wasn't too cold and i had space (dirty) to sleep. in any case, cos of the late arrival, we missed one morning dive and power nap. waited till 1 plus for first dive. in any case, while waiting got to break d ice w 4 new pals playing pictionary.

first dive was uneventful. second dive was cut short by heavy rain. nite dive was cancelled cos of rain. so we lost out on two dives.

Day two: second dive an the pinnacle was worth all the missed out dives and crap. simply BEAUTIFUL!!! but surface currents were horrendous. we practically dragged ourselves down using the bouyline instead of free descend. by the time i hit the bottom, i've used up quite a bit of air. BUT IT WAS AWESOME.

Things i tried out tis trip: new accomodation, cutting down the number of weights to 2 (not a very good idea), launching the sausage (yeah E, i used it three times!!! but only 1/3 or 1/2 inflated. lol. but i did it myself!!)

Its farnie how in the beginning of my dive trips i'm not excited and in fact question why on earth i like to dive and 'suffer' the journey there when i'm not that comfy in water.. etc. but after meeting new pple... getting to noe them better... spending time interacting... looking at nature.. the horizon... under the sea... the sense of weightlessness (when i'm more in control) i noe y i go diving... tho i'm quite sure the next time round i'm on my way to the next dive, i'll question myself again.

all in all.. it was a good dive. superduper bruised. took pictures of bruises. looks like CSI pics. wld hv loaded them here if i knew how to. lol. mohamark had fun poking my bruises (EVEN IN THE SEA!!!) TM said i dun hv to worry abt taking bus home cos i hv loads of 'gor-kard jit-kor' (fifty-cents & one dolar coins). my gosh... 16 on left leg, 8 on right leg, NONE on right hand, and 2 on left hand of various sizes. quite a sight. *laughs*

meanwhile.... i'm glad i made it home safely. haven't gotten time to rest. still wldn't hv. so looking forward to break after i'm back from china. :)

ENFP

i noe i'm supposed to be in bed soon. i noe i hv yet to pack my bag for the camp tom morn. but i cant help doing this instead. mua ha ha. looks like i outta change my profession.

Your #1 Match: ENFP

The Inspirer You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends. You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules. Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives. You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller! You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.

Your #2 Match: INFP

The Idealist You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world. Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships. It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close. But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop. You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist.

Your #3 Match: ENFJ

The Giver You strive to maintain harmony in relationships, and usually succeed. Articulate and enthusiastic, you are good at making personal connections. Sometimes you idealize relationships too much - and end up being let down. You find the most energy and comfort in social situations ... where you shine. You would make a good writer, human resources director, or psychologist.

Your #4 Match: INFJ

The Protector You live your life with integrity, originality, vision, and creativity. Independent and stubborn, you rarely stray from your vision - no matter what it is. You are an excellent listener, with almost infinite patience. You have complex, deep feelings, and you take great care to express them. You would make a great photographer, alternative medicine guru, or teacher.

Your #5 Match: ENTP

The Visionary You are charming, outgoing, friendly. You make a good first impression. You possess good negotiating skills and can convince anyone of anything. Happy to be the center of attention, you love to tell stories and show off. You're very clever, but not disciplined enough to do well in structured environments. You would make a great entrpreneur, marketing executive, or actor.

What's Your Personality Type?

yeah i did it again

i just successfully shouted at my sis to f***off. No i'm not proud of it. But neither am i ashamed of it. Because I'm just damn pissed off. and i'm damn pissed with her stupid bf for making her decide to stay here instead of the damn big place she has in my eldest sister's place. say should stay as a family? my foot! if stay as a family den stop doing unreasonable things.

bong, tis is something you will never ever understd. u did not understd the foreboding feeling you noe things WILL happen. either a matter of days, or in this case, close to immediately. thanks for understanding E.

actually tis is stupid. i kindof expected it. Tuesday, the CG was speaking abt how God works for the good of all He loves through difficulties and suffering. Some may question: you call this suffering compared to the many others out there? Ok, call me immature, call me very selfcentered, but yes, this is suffering to me. and this is a thorn in my flesh.

Oh God, I seriously need Your grace. Daddy, I'm sorry for my selfcenteredness and I noe You are in charge. I dunno how I'm gonna go thro these days. Moving out - is but an escape You are not pleased with. Staying put - yet being bonded by the sense of foreboding and dread of home is not what You ask of me either. Help me to glorify You. Remind me of Jesus I pray.

Meanwhile, I'm about to leave for my dive trip. I was angry with my mom just now because I partly blame her for how things have turned out all these years in relation to this matter. But yet I love her and dun wanna hurt her the way I noe i had.

Crap. God help me.

of nostalgia... of solitude...

juz back from meeting for kunming trip when i realized... my 'beloved' sis has moved back. she was away for a couple of weeks cos my mom went to stay over w my eldest sis. oh.. the peace and solitude.... now that she's back... Grace oh Grace

kept wondering if i made a mistake deciding to go on a dive tis weekend cos of wats coming up in next couple days and weeks. but now that she's back, yeah, not bad an idea.

will b away tom. back on mon nite. den tues will be off for full day CIP w kids. wed - fri will b out for camp and watchnite duties for the kids. sat will be full day in sch to meet parents, followed by meeting for kunming. and i'm leaving tues.

will hardly be home. maybe not so bad afterall...

man i'll miss the peace.

i'm an old woman...

my body has worn out after months of not running. FINALLY got to run today. man, it was tough. engine was totally like rusty and all. but thankfully i finished my 3+km in decent time.

suddenly recalled running the cambodia w some of the boys last year. man tt was fun. yeah, and no, i wldn't b heading for cambodia tis jun. wanted to. but just too busy to attend the meetings.... well.. i'll just send my baby boy there w the team den.... God doesn't tink its time for me, and so shall it be.

i hv decided to take up an offer by an NGO to help facilitate their volunteers. thot for over a week. actually still not sure, but decide to just take it on and see how....

meanwhile, sch is getting really tough. i'm so caught up w admin, prep for all the upcoming events... my teaching has suffered.. alas....

now still decideing whether or not to go for dive tis weekend. would like to hv a break, but afraid things might crop up....

old woman signing off.

major damage control

my boss for the kunming trip misintepreted my committee members' words and first thing in d morn i was gently confronted with something. Was a little upset. but its okiez. things do happen. words do get perceived differently. not much damage control i can do.

i looked forward to bringing my guitar girls out for the concert tonite. then as i was trying to do my bit on the 'can't do much damage control' for the previous thing, realized that i've gotten the venue for tonite's concert wrong. it was my oversight. most students have left school by then. i called my assisting teacher and we spent the next couple of hours calling them up. it was tough. i half wanted to strangle myself for wanting to bring them out, though i noe that was stupid. had to 'assure' some very 'concerned' parents as there are a couple of gals whom they themselves cannot contact. assured them i will pick them from the first venue personally and send them to the correct venue. managed to get all but three. everyone asked me to pray. i did, silently and quickly in my heart cos i dun hv time to pause to do a 'proper prayer'. whether it 'works' or not, i went on.

5.55pm. 5 mins before i was going to step out of my house to go to the wrong venue to pick the 'uncontacted gals', one called. phew. I just needed to reach one of the other two - they were together. i told God, i'll try till 6pm. By 6pm i finally got respond from one of their mobile but it was picked up. i prayed. bcos i'm so much closer now. 6.01, the fon got thro. i was saved the trip to the wrong venue.

not sure if i'll hear from parents. but i thank God for bringing someone (seroiusly out of the blue) who brought to my attention this matter. and i thank God He got the two gals for me. I thank God the gals enjoyed themselves and are hopefully inspired. and i thank God its over for tonite.

meanwhile, no talking shop tonite.

the 'too many things happening' equation

Too many things happening = no time to blog these things.

anywayz i wanna watch Kingdom of Heaven. anyone interested?

Friday has been announced to be a day off for my school bcos of the good results from SYF and success of the concert friday nite. P tinks trs n students hv worked hard n done well so declaring a day off.

strangely, teachers themselves while happy, are half frustrated by this proposal and kindof made noise... me included. our scheduled tests have been disrupted, situation not helped by the fact all CA marks hv to be entered next week itself (means marking, plus keying in, plus checking of grades.. is gonna b crazy)

wats wrong w us? day off also complain.. geesh....

did an approx 16km hike from bukit timah to mandai tis morn. ended later than expected cos the person who was supposed to guide us came late. end now... crazily marking.

1. S3 Test 4 (done)
2. S2 Test 3 (done)
3. S2 Files
4. S3 Files
5. S3 graded assignment (done)
5. Key in grades and get kids to verify
6. for concert excursion for guitar gals - transport, forms, payment (done)
7. for excursion for geog students to watch nile river movie - confirmation w other teachers on dates, get parent helpers, forms, payment, consent forms
8. kunming trip - kids for vaccination, first aid list, log list, list for kids, go thro proposal by various committees (prog booklet, cultural prog), liaise w another org for a presentation come friday
9. go thro proposal by guitar com for get tog session
10. contact my sugar baby regarding cambodia (done)
11. prep for S2 lesson
12. Prep for S3 lesson
13. meet the director from YC (done)
14. arrangement for CIP trip for my guitar gals
15. check the guitar inventory

I tink tt's all... i hope... *fingers-crossed* oh, and of course, to visit my nephew again... hopefully tis week. possible? *sighz*

AND btw, my elder sis is PREGNANT again. i hope for a gal tis time. hek hek hek

You Belong in London A little old fashioned, and a little modern. A little traditional, and a little bit punk rock. A unique woman like you needs a city that offers everything. No wonder you and London will get along so well. What City Do You Belong in? Take This Quiz :-) Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

r u kidding? london's is really not on my list. maybe i just hv wrong perception of d place. hey and watever happened to the choice of font for blogger? now i'm stuck w huge words... *grumbles*

He who cares for and feeds the sparrows

is the Alpha and Omega.
is the Creator of heaven and the earth.
is faithful from before I was born through each breathe I take.
is faithful to accomplish every good thing He has already begun.

That, is something I have learnt and relearnt all my life.
That, would be something my gals have learnt a little through a major disappointment at tis time of their lives.

Wednesday, eve of SYF for guitar, 6.30pm, on bus 158 enroute home
Looked out of window and saw some sparrows hopping by the road at d traffic light. Wondered how it'd feel to hold one of them. Small, warm, full of life. Looked at their 'fake' camoflauge eye and the real eyes. Thot of how if my Abba provides for these little creatures, how much more would He provide for me (us - the guitar gals).

Thursday, 6.15am, on bus to school.
Started to rain. I thot 'surely God tis cant be Your showers of mercy rite?' When the bus reached another location, we moved out of the rain zone and I'm like.. hee.. thank You. So its not showers of mercy. (wondering whether i wan showers of mercy or not, because i have no brolly w muaz!) When bus moves on, it POURED and the song i HAPPENED to (or maybe, it wasn't happened to) listen was "open the floodgates of heaven let it rain". I'm like... OMIGOD... You serious God? but i've got no brolly. *laughs* in any case, God told me He's gonna bless and provided for me at the same time - when my next bus came, the rain stopped!!! My instructor got a verse too "Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us" 1 John 5:14,15

Thursday 12.30pm, Auditorium, SCH
Announced that my girls were awarded a silver. Girls were extremely upset (understatement). It was prep-talk from auditorium, out of auditorium, back in school. All the rousing them up, then preptalking them over the week had completely drained me. But still, as i told the gals, the LORD has d best for us, just we dunno wat it is then.

Friday 8.30pm, School
Girls finished their 2nd performance for the day. Over the day, they learnt much, they experienced much. They learnt wat it meant to truly enjoy music. They learnt wat it meant to perform. They had fun. THey learnt wat disappointment is. I hope they learnt what it means to give thanks in times of disappoinment.

Now, i'm gonna leave school. rest time. Amen to He who cares for and feeds the sparrows.

bohemian vs power suit

My style of dressing: Bohemian

That has been confirmed by a couple of pple... ana, pple for the tues CG, and just today, my colleagues HZ n TS mentioned tt again. While its a style i'm proud of and luv, there are times i lust for the power suits.

Components of the power suit: makeup, nail polish, groomed brows, heels, jacket, tailored pants/snugly fitted skirts, DARK.

i luv the power combi too but alas, my profession does not allow me to don that without attempting suicide. there are times i wish i cld wear something tt makes me not look so 'unpro' when i teach, but under practical circumstances, i cant. walking from block to block (reads: changi to jurong), 'entertaining' and 'performing' in classrooms of soaring temperatures... means under the power suit, i'll either suffer heatstroke, tortured knees, kua-li face, or all of the above. G was appalled with her question "u mean u dun even put on a little bit of makeup?" *sighz*

meanwhile, i luv my boho dressing. simple, comfy n fuss-free... makes me who i am. *chuckles* but the lust for power suits still lingers....

of taxi-drivers

there has so far only been 3 occasions when i refused to thank the taxi-drivers b4 i get off the cabs.

1. a seemingly drunk? not too alert? senile? driver.
that was totally nitemare leaving my legs jelly upon arrival back home. experience written down somewhere in blog last year.

2. he went on as many highways as possible before getting me home.
tt was just last tues after CG. was rushing to get home. got cab from tanjong pagar. i cant rem wat the route shld b, but am absolutely sure he took d wrong oneSS. He took ECP (which is not exactly rite oredi), nvm. he exited near beach rd (when he shld hv done either a fort road or katong one), nvm. went into beach rd and turned into nicol highway (when he cld hv headed straight into lavender/kallang).nvm. from nicol highway he exited from geylang (when he cld hv done a paya lebar).... i was too tired so i only realized the wrong turns after they were made. thankfully he was a reckless driver. so i did not get home too late.

3. he drove at a freaking snail's pace.
i cld hv taken a bus. might hv taken d same amt of time at a fraction of the cost. got lift from mommy n cabbing from ard her place. tis old man, the meter barely moved beyond 40km/hr. thankfully d distance was not too long... if not, i cld hv died....

ask me to choose between driver #3 (slow driver does not mean safe driver) and a typical cabby (reads: reckless speeder).... gimme the latter. *laughs*

cloud gazing

i brought one class cloud gazing to show them wat cumulonimbus clouds really looked like. syllabus has changed such tt tt's d only cloud they learn abt. anywayz,tt day was perfect for cloud gazing. clouds appeared in their various stages of formation into a towering giant cauliflower. told them how i used to 'smoke' my frens telling them whether a heavy rain will ensue within a day based on the shape & height of the cumu clouds. fri told them either fri nite or sat heavy rain... and it rained heavy alrite last nite.

when i told them abt d rain i was tinking, oh no, but God tom we are gonna watch movies openair... rain can rain rite time? it rained close to the time movies were to b screened. but just before tt. so by the time movies were due to roll, rain had stopped. when i told FL abt the heavy rain, i wasn't extremely worried cos i knew rains from cumu clouds only last short while - 1 or 2 hours at most. talk abt how God really works in the physical laws of nature. lol...

but i did not leave the nite feeling happy.... i felt blue. hv some inkling idea wat caused the blueness, but they are many small issues which i hv chosen to brood on. so move on. wat helps me move on... the reminder that i'm just a passerby...

"All these faithful ones ........ saw it all from a distance and welcomed the promises of God. They agreed that they were no more than foreigners and nomads here on earth. And obviously people who talk like that are looking forward to a country they can call their own. .... But they were looking for a better plce, a heavenly homeland. That is why God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a heavenly city for them" Heb 11: 13 - 16

Yeah. Been reading Hebrews. Its a great book to start one from the beginning to looking to the end. Meanwhile integrating this book into the fast-paced life constantly filled with urgent matters to look into is a challenge.

Truly humbled

I do not even noe where to begin.

No, I haven't been like really 'passionate' or 'on' or 'super-duper-filled-with-the-Holy-Spirit' sort of thing. But big things the Lord has revealed to me in small matters.

He has called me for a purpose. I am created to worship Him. I am called to be an extension of His hand. He will empower me for His purpose. He has won the battle and I enjoy His victory.

I had been living a defeated life. I think little of myself, in the area of work esp. (well, nothing wrong with that. i am little but He is big). I have allowed the 'mini-me' to shadow my big Dad. I hv allowed the spirit of delay to hold me back.

No longer so. Thro small things, my gracious and faithful Dad has shown me big things. mini-me doesn't matter. Daddy will pave the way and use mini-me. In fact, within the past 5 days He has chosen me to put into His jigsaw, little pieces into place. He brought a seeker for me to speak to, He put gals who wanted to noe more abt Christianity for me to spend time with, He brought gals from my class to approach me to pray, He made me lead a short worship. I'm not boasting, for I have nothing to boast about. I am humbled by how even tho i'm really truly so unworthy, so 'not ready', so 'not on fire'... all He asks is obedience... and He will empower for His kingdom. I am truly humbled.

My prayer is Father, unveil my eyes to see You, my ears to hear You. May my eyes never depart from You, my heart always close to Yours. Teach my Your heart, Your will, Your word. I claim Your promise You have spoken in Hebrews that You will reveal Your word in the minds and hearts of Your children. Give me the strength to carry forth Your tasks to love, the wisdom to know how to love, and Jesus' heart. Amen.

Term 2 Week 3

Monday
NAFTA day for the kids. Spent d entire afternn timing shuttle run. different perspective being the timer. I finally bought a new bible. After giving away the small one to my trek guide in nepal, i hv been surviving w tis really old big bible. i noe all bibles are the same, but d feel is different. it din feel so 'special' or 'personal'. So invested in one. Not cheap. but an investment. metal cased NLT.

Tuesday
Meetings day. Staff meeting followed by meeting for china trip in jun followed by d CG. Was late and left early. Exhausted.

Wednesday
Went for a session in another sec sch in the afternn and rushed for worship prac. pretty fun prac.

Thursday
Uneventful day which was good. needed the rest.

Friday
had lunch out at parkway w the trainee and contract teachers. bought a workbag. totally zonked out for the week. struggled to keep awake til ten and concuzzed.

Saturday
morn spent ironing away. afternn spent baking. evening at fort canning for ballet under the stars. it was like picnic style. me like it. later hung out w FL and her fren. its farnie how i ended up explaining stuff abt Christ. I mean... i'm like... me? its been a long long long time.

Sunday
Tough worship sessions. very sleepy cos got home late yest nite, plus mozzie attack. so cldn't sleep. song service somemore. so no w i'm gonne hit the sack

woke up late

and almost missed service or attended another church's service.

in d end went for service late. for once, in a long while, i was able to concentrate on d sermon.

nonetheless, i'm no saint still. i still cannot stand my sister. (refraining from use of word 'detest'). patience tested.

back to school... back to marking.. .haiz.... i hope i dun screw up.

Music playing... inside my room... while raining cool outside...

Its been an eventful week. Some highlights:

1. I passed my First Aid test on Thursday night.
The test took longer than usual becoz the examiner whom the entire class couldn't stand deliberately tested us on things we weren't taught! And he was a mean old man who thot the world of himself. In any case, we did not end w a happy note cos just as we were leaving one lady lost her HP. it was apparently stolen. the irritating examiner did nothing to help. he just let pple from other class walk out. only our class were nice enuff to stay. stuck there for longer than expected. but still... i passed.. and i even aced my class for the theory section!

Really thank God. Farnie as in, in this 'small matter' of first aid, my impression is i need to do my part in studying. but pple ard me keep telling me... PRAY... yeah.. of course pray, but i need to do my part too dun i?

2. Put to use my first aid knowledge the following day.
msged SHR to tell her i passed. she was farnie. out of humor, she replied 'yeah, tom u r ready to save lives in the sports meet'. urm... 'prophecy'... *laughs* i ended up doin bandage for a colleauge and helped her cos she was feeling faint. i mean i actualyl noewat to do!! i do feel gd tt i was able to not just feel concern.. but also noe wat to do...

3. some of my guitar club gals are actually afraid of me!
*laughs* they dun dare to hand in forms to me when late. wld rather pass to the other tr. MUA HA HA. FINALLY! some kids afraid of me! sadistic rite? actually happy studnets afraid of me. ke ke ke. but i do need that my gosh! if only more are afraid. *chuckles*

4. Tuesday CG
It was nice. haven't worshipped w pple like tt for a while, just sitting on the floor in a circle... w only guit accomp. reminds me of my CF and church youth days. praying tog in smaller grps gave me a strange familiar but yet unfamiliar feeling. but timing is not very ideal cos they end very late. and anywayz, i'm still not sure. need to ask Him whether this is the grp.

5. Fri
Yest was mad. Had Sports Day after which rushed gals for a prac in the SCH. just being in the venue itself made them tense and they cldn't perform up to std. worrying. currently not gold std. i wld give them a silver. but we hv the hope of achieving gold. 1. they can perform if we cont to push for the last 3 weeks. 2. we hv the grace of God. He noes wats best.

Den rushed for massage w HZL we had been planning long long ago.. and overdue for a month. thereafter, we had dinner at kfc. we spoke openly abt our religions. she listend to me talk abt my exp in Christianity. i listened to her and her views abt Islam. in fact, she told me she was glad one of her class gals received Christ cos she tinks pple need religion. But God, how do i do my part as a fren of hers?

6. Meanwhile, gonna b really busy w many things due soon. and we are just starting our plans for the kunming trip in 10 weeks. only had our first meeting yest! gosh...

So tt's enuff update. hv to move on to work oredi. :)

Updates

Went for the Jazz at d beach w FL again yesterday. Tis time round, they were doing latin groove. Its nice except it gets tiring w all the upbeats throughout the evening. Smooth jazz was better last weekend. Anywayz, met KV again. It was quite farnie. He posed a simple qns: how was the week tt's past? It was a tough qns to ans! All i cld manage was a: had my ups n downs....

thankfully... downs were less... so i'll start w downs...

Downs:
1. Been exhausted.... even with sleep... strange.
2. Was demoralized for a brief moment.... related to work. When u feel tt effort put in wasn't given due recognition... anywayz,.... brief moments... passed....

Ups:
1. Did my first long distance of abt 5km finally at east coast on friday evening. Crowded beach. I realized tt major changes (at least to me) had taken place! The fencing and vegetation at the stretch between the seafood restaurant and the lagoon food center has been removed! Pedestrains route has changed. Previously blocked by the fencing... it is now a spacious and open area. Good or bad? I don't know. Just different. Gone were all my memories of running beside the cycling track w all the different pple.... Wats 'up' abt tis? i realized.... i thank God that i am blessed w the health to run... i am blessed w the health to come out and appreciate east coast...

2. Over these two weeks i hv been encouraged by my new frens, FL's "CH" frens mainly. i hardly noe them... but the joy of the Lord that they have are infectious. They dun talk abt it... but....its something one senses... i might join FL for her tues CG (she claims its CG tho i'm like... ITS 50-pple BIG! its NOT a CG). Timing is quite 'gd' actually... i hv been 'feeling' i shld join a grp somehow... i did not say anything.... and FL came along... it seems God has put these jazz meetings in place.. cos last week, i did not plan to go for tt session. Half the time i wanted to back out, go home, even on the journey. somehow, i managed to turn up.... noe these pple.... i hv no idea wats in store. slowly i'm 'missing' the passion i use to hv... slowly i'm 'missing' living life w purpose... now entirely clear abt the purpose yet... but... slowly.... in any case, my priority is to pass my first aid course first. lol....

3. i m reminded that i hv been bought by the blood of Christ. That doesn't just mean i'm saved. That also means i'm a co-heir of His kingdom. That also means i'm His daughter. That also means He's my fren. That also means i live the 'now' in view of the 'after'.... which is wat got me out of the demoralized state. *laughs* let's see how long tis will last.

Meanwhile its Monday again. My prayer Abba is that You will help me to face it w joy, not to take work as burden, but as opportunities You have blessed me with to bless. I ask Abba that You will give me the wisdom to deliver knowledge... wisdom to discern.... wisdom to guide. Amen.

exhausted giraffe

just came back from my first aid course. sometimes i wonder to myself whether i'm killing myself signing up for these couple of courses....

in any case, we did CPR today. i partnered a secondary boy. he n his classmates gotta pass this for some badge for scouts. it was hilarious. he was probably the farniest guy during CPR and got 'whacked' by my instructor a couple of times.

test will b next thurs. i'm not even halfway thro reading the book.. alas.. and much work... just exhasuted...

nite by the beach...

just came back from sentosa.

been wanting to go for at least one of the jazz sessions at the beach (planning one next week as seen in earlier blog). but today FL called me up last min. so i scrapped d plan of running at EC and headed to sentosa.

journey took longer than expected. all the time wanted to turn back and go home and rest. (i've been sleeping all day today! but its good rest). fortunately i did not, cos the music n company was worth it.

gd to see FL again. got to noe her frens too. they were nice. got to noe a fellow guitar club OTIC of another sch. a lady from an organization i can possibly collaborate w. (yeah, cant stop talking shop). we played dtydti after the music session was over. overall it was a nice evening out.

i'm thankful for today. tho i slept most of it away, i really got to rest today. thank u Daddy. :)

now hv to go rest for church tom... and den.... term 2 week 1... commences.....

Current state: hungry

Two events i'll like to go to...

1. Filmmaking Workshop by National Geographic Channel.
Getting behind the scenes and learning trade secrets with Bryan Smith, Executive VP of Production for National Geogprahic Channels International. Gives insider's view of the creation of a NG documentary, with the focus on storytelling and character devt.
Mar 26, 3 - 5pm, library@orchard

2. Jazz by the beach
Performance by The Groove, a multi-ethnic grp tt performs in Latin jazz.
Mar 26, 6 - 10.30pm, Siloso Beach, Sentosa Island.

Both fall on the same day. On Sunday, a day I'll usually work. The Sunday just before my First Aid certification test on 31st. sigh.... hope i can make it for either one. anyone wanna join me?

Home

a place of rest.
where one retreats from the many stimuli outside.
where one finds time to breathe.

was just reminded of this.
been exhausted even before i left for perhentian.
ave waking hours at home for the past 2 weeks been less than 2 hours (excluding trip)
courses... more courses... sch camp... church prac...
i look fwd to sat when i can finally have a decent no. of hours at home.

Dive of the trip

Really exhausted now. But must blog tis most happening dive of the trip in...

Date: 13 Mar Site: Sugar Wreck
Time in: 1320hrs Time out: Approx 1430
Dive buddy: PL
Other dive mates: GR n EV
Divemaster: Yoe

Immediately after descend:
Visibility was about 1.5 - 2m. Meaning very bad. I lost my buddy immediately. Was left w GR n EV. We signaled to each other "where are the rest?" and shrugged shoulders with hands out in response "dunno". Hung ard descend point for half a min to wait and heard Yoe horn for us. But sound travels in all directions in liquid, so had no idea where he is. Suddenly he appeared w PL. And we proceeded w dive.

Approx 10mins into dive:
Was following Yoe closely cos of the low visibility. Occasionally checking on back for buddy. Just at the moment I did not check, Yoe signalled to me "where's ur buddy?" I turned back. Yellow cloudiness. All missing. (PL later told me she was playing w sea urchin w the rest, so got lost. lol) We backtracked quite a bit. Did the SOP. Search for a min den ascended to find them. After a while, saw them a distance away. They had to fight the currents to swim back to us. Poor pple. I was really glad i wasn't in their position.

We descended again.

Within 5 mins of descend
Yoe suddenly stopped turned back and blocked PL. A fishing line with many hooks was dropped right in front of him and us. We were too close. He took the line, tugged it (the person above was trying to pull it up, ha, thot it was big fish *laughs*) and snapped it. We went on with dive.

Next many minutes....
Saw many stuff... fish... corals... urchins... etc... nice dive site! And i made it a point to check on my buddy more often.

Last 5 mins
We were at abt 5 - 9 m depth. Abt time to do safety stop. I stopped checking on my buddy den cos... well... we were ending dive, and seriously at tt depth and good visibility, there was no reason how anyone could be missing! But... i was... wrong....
Yoe took up an urchin and played w it on his palm. I was looking at the urchin and all. Den decided to check on buddy. BUT THEY WERE NOT THERE!! Incredible. Yoe was also like... huh? So we looked ard tt area only (cos anywayz, everyone noes we were to end dive soon, so wldn't drift far). I spotted some bubbles, but those disappeared quickly. So we just did our safety stop, meanwhile i was playing w a batfish.

Ascended...
A distance away, i saw the rest of them climb up the boat. The boat came for us. We went up too...

The story behind why they got lost:
GR was v low on air again, so was sharing air w PL. So a bit like mahfan oredi. At this point, of all times, EV's mask strap gave way!!! So while using alternate air source, GR had to work on EV's mask while PL held on to the two of them. Finally they all ascended w EV like a blind person being led ard for that short while. LOL. And the farnie part was, both GR n PL thot EV was pulling a stunt when she turned to them w no mask! LOL. Absolutely hilarious. I missed the show. *chuckles*

We all concluded that must hv been d most happening dive of the trip. Pple got lost 3 times. We had a situation of guys going on alternate air source while leading a 'blind' diver ard. KE KE KE.

battered body

sun burnt from face to arms to legs... as in... really red and feeling quite raw.

rashes all over the body... arms and legs.... dunno where from. my guess... from the sea and showering with salt water all the 3 days as there's like no freshwater to shower in!!

bruises on both my arms.. and urm.. yah, legs also. from where? God noes.. prob from climbing up (actually i mean being hauled up onto) the speedboats from the sea.

cuts by corals on knees.... and abrasion on ankle cos of sand in booties....

battered... battered... battered...

narcosed giraffe

just reached home from perhentian.

'interesting' dives.

great dive sites.

saw many new things like anemones and corals i've neva seen before, fish like titan triggerfish, porcupine fish (the one in Shark's Tale that puffs up, razor fish, many many...

v. long journey.

nice local dive operator and DMs.

gotta noe PL

terrible food

very very very exhausting dives after dives.. such that the person-in-charge and a senior DM told us straight in our faces that we are crazy to try to clock so many dives in those hours.

no time to blog 'interesting' details cos got course tom morn... till nite... argh...

zzz... w wet hair...

long long long day

early in morn, last min call to tell me i hv to go sch on my own. by God's grace, i made it down in spite of late notice.

long day of many periods.

did marking.

did 2.4km run for the sch sports event. darn warm weather.

went for my first aid course.

darn tired now. but feeling pretty good...

long long long day

lesson observation is finally over today.... after much trauma. my performance was not up to my expectations. But will do. :)

met up w dive gang sat nite. tho things are not as 'simple' as previously, its nice to meet and talk abt simple things... :) getting pple who are concerned abt u, ur work... being caught up w each others' stories... always good to see my xiao mei, buddy, GR, LD n RG, ha ha.. esp the first two!

SYF coming up. Training intensifying. But half the time i still dunno wats going on.. worrying

starting my first aid course tom. hope i dun kill anyone...

still tinking abt tis thing called frenship. questioning the 'value/worth' of the so-called 'the times we've spent together in the past'. i used to treasure those and treasure old frenships. now i'm qnsing. does it matter? bcos it doesn't seem to matter for others. rediscovering.

looking forward to trip to perhentian tis weekend. been planning for it since end last yr when i looked at all the weekends. HA... its finally coming.

did my 2.4km run last wed. horrifying timing!! from 13+ mins mths ago, i degraded to 16 freaking plus mins!!! i'm a slow giraffe.

no input for now oredi. in a state of.... 'no feeling'. :) morning stressed... after observation was in cloud nine and very stimulated after the time w my extremely active class today... now.... emotions all expendited in the day... all gone.... :) looking fwd to meet my bed after watching desperate housewives.

the mouse escaped....

i did not even hear it drop... the apple mouse i was bringing home w the notebook for work. just checked the retail price of it... cost a freaky 50 bucks!

sigh... everyone in sch 'envys' me for hving the cool processor.. but alas.. the price that comes with it....

can anyone tell me where i can get a replacement mouse at a cheaper rate?

Current state: Cant be bothered to really think of loss - too tired.

Memory

1. CATS
Of all the musicals I've watched, either live performances or on computer, there is only one musical I can neva comprehend. And that is CATS. This thing about Jelico cat, a fat cat that looks like Moses, and the shabby cat which got to go out to 'outer space??'

Pardon my ignorance. I still dun understd the plot of the musical. *chuckles* Only thing I take back with that musical - the nice melody of Memory, and the inspiration of continuing with my ballet classes seeing the dancers.

2. Of NIE
I was on the cab going home from church this afternoon. Out of the blue, memory of times spent in NIE came to my mind. Tho everyone complains the course is... urm.... well.. I leave it to one's disgression, one thing for sure, we met nice people, frens we remember even tho we are all to busy to meet up. Those days spent... in NTU's canteen A ... in the computer lab queuing up to get a computer terminal... then, i wanted to be out quickly, to stop 'wasting' time and to meet real people, or at least do something for people. Now, i recollect the memory with a smile.

No, I do not intend to go back to NIE again. I dun prefer NIE days than now. Neither do I prefer these days to the NIE days. I'm just learning to appreciate them... as life goes on...

Current state: frying in hot weather, brain shutdown

proud of my gal

tis gal who encouraged me by stepping up to play guitar for morn devotion despite her nervousness.... who at a point wanted to give up....

she took the effort to prac d song w me yest.... to come early again to prac the song tis morn...

and she did very well ... *applause* *smiles* i'm proud of her, and i'm sure God is too.. because she chose to do it for Him.

first song she ever played for sch assembly was 'Find us Faithful'. May she be found faithful in these little things that she does, and may tis be the beginning of the beautiful journey she chooses to serve Him with music. i am sure this will come to pass.

Current activity: stoning and munching pineapple tarts.

of matchmaking

since friday, THREE pple told me they wanna matchmake me to some pple they noe. its not the first time pple try to matchmake me. But within four days??? different ppl just come along d way and express their concerns tis way... WAT'S GOING ON?!?

Fri, my dear bong srey LD went 'hey my sis asked if u interested in her colleauge (?? i cant rem wat the relationship is lah). he's a teacher, nice guy'.

Sun, ana used this question 'will u date a serious guy?' i went 'i dunno, it really dps. y?' she went ' oh, yest nite was out for wedding dinner. saw JMY's fren, he's tall. and i tink he's nice. but he's very serious...' and so.. it goes on....

TODAY!!! JUST.... my mom went 'u free for a chat?' i went 'well, i'm always busy. but if u wanna talk i'll talk w ya.' she went ' i have a fren.. who asked.... ' and it goes on....

i like to tink tt i dun portray myself as desperate. lol. i'd like to take it as a compliment tt frens only introduce other frens when they tink u are nice. *sweet smile*

its just farnie....

Current state: LOLROF & trying to get back to work.

This weekend....

I did quite a couple of things...

Fri afternn, met up w my bong sreys for coffee in town. LD was as bubbly as ever. :) We had a good time... catching up... talking abt end times.... My bongs encouraged me to pursue further studies... very inspiring to see them... :)

Sat was spent doing work in the day. Evening, met up w GR again! to catch Constantine. One of the comment someone gave me abt the show was "weird", and that it wldn't go down too well w Catholics. Well, i tink it doctrinely speaking (if there's such a term) it wldn't go down well w many religions. lol. but barring this, it is an interesting watch, with good sound & music effects. Bits of dark, despair, peppered with some dark humor. Some resemblance to Matrix, but, a notch higher (or maybe i just got bored of Matrix revolutions & reloaded). Watever it is, its nice to catch a movie that's not boring. :)

Sun. Church. It was a little long. :P But message was 'clean n clear'. Had lunch w Ana, Jmy, Kv & Jrmy. Its not a usual combi of pple tog. But its pretty nice. Been a while since i went out for lunch w old pals after church.

So on the overall i had a good weekend. *smile*

and i did not get to watch the movie...

went all the way to the cinema... and.... no tix!! thanks to GR who tinks tt THERE WILL BE SEATS cos its wed nite. anywayz, he got bashed up .... and i got a free meal. but stil... I DID NOT GET TO WATCH THE MOVIE!!

and i bought a glue gun. for wat? i was tinking wat to do with it on my way home, realized alas dun really noe wat to do w it. lol....

ah... i noe.... SHOOT GR!!!

i am encouraged....

by two of my gals. particularly encouraged because they were from my 'very challenging' class last year. the class tt seriously took up so much energy from me. the class notoriously known by teachers not teaching them. tis year, some of the gals started saying 'i miss you' or 'why are you not teaching us this year'. Some out of plain mischief (i'm sure), some sincerely (i'm sure too) [tho i still qns myself if i've done them any good teaching them english given i'm not trained to do it]. in any case, its been nice seeing them for music only so far. however, today God blessed me with a pleasant surprise to show me that, hey, He's at work.

During the last period I had for the day, these two gals after finishing music lesson came and tell me that they were interested in playing the guitar for morn devotion. See, I just challenged my guitar club gals yest to serve God and the sch in tis manner yest (urm, half thinking, they prob wldn't volunteer, i hv to noe them better and encourage 'forcefully'. Little did i expect them to step up... and from THAT class. These two gals have been nice all this while. But still, to expect gals from THAT class.... *smile* i pushed them further. when i knew they cld play other instruments, i challenged them to work on these instruments to play for chapel. they were apprehensive. so told them i'll train them tis year, next year den play, and they agreed!!! i was just like "oh my God, seriously..." it puts a smile on my face....

other than that.. the week has been work work work. Work is starting to pile up. Half the time i wonder if i can cope, or whether i'll screw up (yeah still tink tis way as and when). but like i say.. i tink too mych.. worry too much over things i can control THAT much...

so... just learning to appreciate the little things in life.. and to take things easie.r.. :) God is good. (its been a long time since i've said tis. i'm still using a lot of 'mind' and less 'heart' to say this... but more 'heart' than previously, bong)

Oh yeah, and i finally 'exercised' yest. How? By walking 1.5 hrs back home from sch. I'm not crazy. That's ME! mua ha ha...

Learning....

How to play mahjong

1. Get a patient tutor
2. Make sure this tutor is willing to teach for FREE (as in, not make u lose money)
3. First two rounds: Play with all tiles OPENED.
4. Get the poor tutor to explain as you play along.

I learnt how to play mahjong last nite. LOL.. oh maybe, in the wee early hours tis morn. Minus the gambling part, its fun because like dty-dti, requires wits. Under the tutelage of my mentors along the way, I managed to 'hu' two rounds (ha, tt's because I'm not the only learner there).

Generally fun because its still new. In case my mom hears abt me learning this game, let me make tis clear: I dun gamble! Am only willing to play with patient pple who urm, are out for fun, a little brain tweezing n no cash or 'rewards/punishments' etc. involved. *laughs*

The best I get out of it, at least now when I watch all the farnie dushen, duhor, duxia or watever, i noe wat they are doing (or do i?!?)

Current State: Fat like bah-kwah

of ECs

i just had a gd evening in EC (east coast) w EC. ha ha. lame, i noe. I usually hv gd times in EC. One of my fav spots. :)

it was surprisingly crowded, but bulk of the population there were non-chinese. they seem to b having such a good time out there, honestly, i'm pretty envious. wat is one thing we chinese lack compared to our frens of other ethnic races in sg? i'd tink its the family n/or community spirit.
DISCLAIMER: not all families, jus my ob. based on my family and those i've seen.

Lets just take my exp these two days n wat i see.

1. my experience on CNY's eve
knocked off home from work early. tried to help out, but wasn't of much help. :) finally dinner ready. sat down to eat quietly. my fav - steamboat. but i did not hv much to say (pple noeing me will go - r u kidding? nothing much to say? *laughs*) finish dinner, wash dishes. den watched a chinese show. at 10, adjourned into my bedroom to do my mails etc. read my bible. slept at 12ish. did not watch the CNY celeb tv show.

2. wat i saw at EC
COUNTLESS tents scattered all over, clothes hanging outside tents (they camping there for how many nites?!?). some kids sleeping in tents. cooking using mass tin. kids playing. adults sitting ard cooking or talking. one family even had a tv brought over!!! EC n i question how they get recept9ion. perhaps it was vcd they were watching, oh well, doesnt' matter.

I wish i get to do wat these pple are doing. tt's my dream kindof family. but alas... oh well... i suppose at tis moment its as good as it gets. :) muz b thankful.

meanwhile, EC n i continued w our ritual of getting drinks from 7-11/supermkts n sitting ard somewhere to talk. it was nice. sat on the sand in front of the waves, and nice starry nite tonite too! (in sg, its considered starry *chuckles*). talked abt many things. things i'm working on now in life, the future, school, our kids today, etc. it was nice just sitting there to chill. thanks EC for ur encouragement. yes, and i'm still laughing my head off at the "i cant imagine u holding a gal with one hand, and another guy beside u, and his face covered by a black dot cos i dunno who he'll be". *laughs* its a farnie pic. u're rite. neither can i.

wat hv come out of this? one more gd memory to add on to the list of memories i hv of east coast. looking at the stars i tell mayself not to be too myopic as well. the future holds the unknown. we all are uncertain and to some extent hold some fears, but i cannot allow the fear to overcome me. yes. its true. i admit it. i tink too much. nothing wrong w tinking. but certain things i tink.... do not quite add on to life. is it necessarily bad? perhaps not. but maybe i shld cut down on these 'philosopical' thots and work on wats there. :)

oh watever... which explains... the change of my blog title. :)

"when we're young we always think we know everything..
and when we get older, we always think we know nuthin"
(Js, 2005)

how much more true can tt get...

i'm good.

in case anyone thinks i'm depressed based on my previous post (or posts), let me clarify, i'm good. *laughs*

1. previous blog was just to straighten out my thots.

2. i only tend to blog things tt hit me more these days and

3. dun human beings rattle more abt negative things than positive?
it takes 1 bad experience for a person to make a complain, and about 1 out of 7 who had good experiences to make a compliment. so tis entry ... well... just to tally that out. *chuckles*

in actual fact, i'm better tis year than last yr. :) God has been patient with me. I noe there are pple who cared cos they prayed for me and reminded me to go to church or read my bible, 'non'-christian included.

i hv been very blessed tis yr. first, english was taken off my teaching load (and that means a LOT). i hv been assigned to a music group as CCA (rather than... urm.. the previous misfit, hee). i will prob b bringing my sch gals for international community service in june, which is wat i really really wanna do! in actual fact, i hv colleagues in sch asking me 'are you happier tis year?' apparently, they did see the difference. one of them even added i had a 'bounce' (literal, cos i bounce when i walk, lol) when i first came back from nepal. lol

all the above... blessings... but i suppose the most impt thing.... tt supercedes the above... wld be cos i hv decided to follow Jesus (again). nope, i'm not a siao onz christian, i'm not a super nice gal. but.... just to decide to follow Him, makes the difference and i noe there's nothing i need to be afraid of.

there are challenges. there are difficulties. my frens may hv left me. situation at home challenging. work.. challenging. my only prayer would be that... i'd learn to see and handle them the way, He wans me to.

so on the overall, i'm good. :)

making sense of the world ard me....

the past four hours has inflicted many emotions and thots, virtually on a rollercoaster ride, so much so that i'm totall confused now.

it was supposed to be a wonderful day. scheduled to meet my bong for breakfast, den a close (?) fren to watch a series... and perhaps hit the beach, or watever.

meet my bong i did. it was a good time sharing. i felt encouraged.

wat happened thereafter was a total nitemare. i was late. so my fren was totally pissed w me. there was some miscom involved, thanks to either my stupid fon or the service provider, probably the former. partly i lost track of time, so i did not respond in time. the afternn appointment was cancelled, by an sms. surprisingly, my stupid fon became super-efficient in delivery that msg to me. wat a cruel joke of life. its been murphy's law for me yesterday. looks like the law still holds on me today.

travelled home. trying to reconcile wat a christian way of handling daily issues like that should be.

made my way home anywayz. got back to.... thot of working on the 'awards' i wanted to make for my students, at least something constructive. before i cld do that... same old conflict w my @$&*#( sister. and i was insulted, again. tis time round, called 'deaf'. as if that wasn't enough, she got my mom into the picture and made me seem like a complete idiot. i was tempted to make a nasty response, but see there wasn't any point to it. just kept quiet, and let things be.

i must admit, i'm particularly emotional today. i'm just totally confused with watever had been happening lately.

*breathes in deeply* just trying to make sense of the world ard me now. *smile* bong says i tink too much. i think, its more like i feel too much. shites, i need to get out of this stupid emotional phase man. i'm tempted to give up and fall into the depths, but there are many more bigger and impt things out there to settle.

meanwhile, how did Christ tackle all these emotional crazes? or does He even go thro these? how do i look at things in life with His perspective?

Home early

today because i got so SO SO upset w two gals that i literally felt like slapping them and like @$&*#(8... so upset that i got a headache.... so hv to come home....

honestly, it wasn't worth being tis upset i admit. i dun even noe wat hv gotten over me. maybe just stressed. or took it upon myself too much. or expected too much from them. *chuckles* my colleagues told me it wasn't worth it, dun be bothered with them... that it was no point... over gals like them.... but.... i seirously tried.... i took time off for them....

frankly, it was easier to sign the papers for them and just release them. "Good riddance" was an adjective used by someone else. Yes, it was easier, but that wasn't the point! They have to learn for crying out loud... Maybe it is easier to just not care. My life will be MUCH EASIER.... less traumatic....

Watever. I shall continue to irritate them and myself. Will be meanie and carry out disciplinary action tom. If I have to become such a meanie to carry my message across, so be it.

Current state: VERY SUPER DUPER EXTREMELY Crossed

Of different professions...

Two professions came to my mind this two days as I look around me.

1. The Security Guard
Friday morn, I saw, the dark siluette of my sch's security guard at the gate, directing the gals to enter from the small gate instd of the one for the cars. I always enter by the other gate, so neva got to see him, or to notice his early-in-the-morn usual motions.

Friday afternn. I was busing home. Took a diff route. Passed by a condo. I saw a security guard sitting just outside the guardhouse on a stool.

I thot to myself, these pple, how are their jobs like? How do they pass their day? What goes through their minds each day as they go through the 'mundane?', 'fruitful?' hours.... mins.... secs...... Was this the job they really want to hold? If so, good. If not, why? Education? Age? given most of them are the retired pple....

2. The 'Pirates' in JB
I was in JB w a fren today (identity will not b disclosed given contents of tis entry). In our 'Katong' area, as expected, as we pass by these 'pirates' they will go 'Ms, wan to watch shows? Come tis way.. we have many shows.'

My fren had to buy dvds for my fren's fren. So we popped in some of these just to do some price comparisons. Much to our surprise, when we gave the name of the shows, they went 'Come inside here'. The door opens... and WOW! i mean... WOW! *laughs* {There's even a cam checking on activities outside} Tis repeats itself a second time at another shop. Did my fren manage to get the stuff? How wld I noe? I went to the bathroom.

We cont'd shopping. Suddenly, the shutters of ALL these 'pirates' shops are down. THey start sitting outside, talking on their mobiles. Business was as usual . They still ask passerbys the same qns. When anyone show interest, up goes the shutter. Prospective customers step in. Down comes the shutter. After some time, up goes the shutter. The customer/shopper exits. Down comes the shutter.

There was a sign on one of the shops saying.... Hiring employees. I wonder.... how are the lives of these 'pirates'?

As for me, I'm still a teacher, leaving my life. Monotonous at times, crazy at times, depressing at times, happy at times, contented at times...

How many possibilities and permutations of lives can there be out there? Only God knows.

My Color

BLUE You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive. Find out your color at Quiz Me!

post-26 December 2004

Humanity shows that it is still very much alive

People become more aware of what's outside their microenvironment

But... ...

Will people also become more indifferent to impacts of natural disasters in the future?

Would they need something of the same or greater magnitude, and visibility to move them?

Life Goes On.......

like it or not.....

i can only do watever i can. circumstances where there's nothing I can do, i can only lift up to my Abba in prayers and trust, at the same time archiving watever memories that might keep me stuck.

meanwhile, life goes on.... and i hv to focus on wat i can work on.... in Him i pray....

My God, what have I done?

An sms... and ends it all....

3 years of happiness, sadness, disappointments, fears, difficulties
of laughter, of tears, of marking, of taking turns to assure each other and all....

An sms... and ends it all....

My God, what have I done?

work reviews...

are headaches (literally) and an absolute waste of time!!!! *squeezes forehead*

Under the influence of drugs....

I'm awake for less than 8 hours today!!!!

Waking hours for today:
9.00 - 1030
2.00 - 4.45
6.30 til now

This is crazy! I'm a sleeping MONSTER!!!

I'm bored now. Have work, but can't do. Scared tonite cant sleep... *sob*

EC....

rem to do wat u supposed to do on sat.

entire nite was spent exploring one of the possibilities i might go for after my bond. the ENTIRE nite.. so much for bringing back work to do.. humbug....

An answer to my qns posted on 1st Jan

What was God's heart in view of the tsunami disaster?

I quote an extract from Chua, M.H.'s article "Where was God when the tsunamis hit?" on today's copy of the Straits Times, which I thot addressed my question aptly (and summed up watever responses i have heard from others):

"Bonhoeffer's famous line puts it thus:'Man is challenged to participate in the sufferings of God at the hands of a godless world.'

To paraphrase that, I would say: Man is challenged to participate in the sufferings of others in a world seemingly without God.

For it is only through man's compassion that God can be seen in suffering and tragedy."

And I learnt one thing - it takes the step of faith to accept this answer, and I pray those around me (you know who you are) will take this step.

Meet the Fockers

was hilarious.....

so was lame EC... ah ha ha....

Disturbing...

Got some cds from a class during music lesson. Requested for them to bring music of different genres to share just in case I still cant screen Les Mis.

Cld screen Les Mis in the end so told them I'll take a look at the cds and familiarize myself with the genres I'm not familiar with myself first before we hold a sharing at a later stage.

One set of CDs let me feeling disturbed. I shall not name the title, or the performer (s). The graphics in the set is disturbing. Shows a performer loading up his gun, after performance shot at audience. Shows injured... frightened..... and dead audience. Finally, the performer shot himself point blank (or at least it was suggested that happened).

These are things kids today are listening today. Maybe its artistic. Its definitely alternative, somehow. But .... wat is this reflecting?

Current state: perturbed

Highlights of d week....

1. wed - taking my first concrete step towards wat i'd like to do in my life. popped by an VNGO n had a short discussion w the wkers there. not bad.

2. wed - pink ipod arrived.

3. thur - took the wrong bus to sch. reached there on the DOT. journey there... panicky...

4. thur - had to fight for gals to get into guitar club. the process was.... chaotic n excruciating. at d same time, got thrown last min bombs of stuff to work on. almost like tsunami. it hits without warning. watever

5. fri - ana smsed last min to cancel dinner appt. my first rxn while in the staffroom "my fren just cancelled dinner appt... i hv no life". yup, fri nite stuck at home.

6. fri - two rebellious gals on the fon. u noe who u are. stop rebelling woman!

current state: alive, still hopeful, still dazed

Obsolete? Inefficient? Up to date?

my insurance agent just sent me a table calender and small planner....

Which blog title shld i adopt?
1. Obsolete
2. Inefficient
3. Up to date?

Man, i tink i need to sleep.. i'm starting to crack up....

It is confirmed.... ....

I have made order and paid for my new ipod PINK!! :)

Life has been 'good'. Been busy, but happily occupied, tho beginning to feel the toil.

Tis afternn was spent interviewing gals who wanted to join guitar club. I expected chaos.. but there wasn't. out of over 70 gals, i cld only choose 15. I felt bad for the others.. many others i wanna give chances to.. but alas... thanks to the quota or watever i was given, i cldn't... :( strangely, i thot no one was interested in GC cos it has not too gd a reputation in sch compared to the more 'high profile n goodie' music grps in sch. in any case, suddenly i was given so much 'power' in determining who gets to be in the cca they wan for the next 4 yrs.... and at the final stage while ranking the 15 names, its like... i hardly noe them.. just based on impression and description scribbled... i type their names.. hardly meant a thing to me... i suppose tt's when these gals' prayers come to work ey... hmmm...

life without teaching english is seriously.... happier...

anywayz.... i'm getting my new ipod.... i'm getting busy with school.. at the same time, EC n i r looking at getting busy doing volunteer work and getting service learning for our schools in place eventually.

tired... but fairly fulfilled... as for now... i refuse to do work... hehz....

Look ahead, XT, look ahead....

I revisited some of the things which happened last year.... I saw mistakes I've made... This time round, the mistakes came evidently, clearly to me... Do I regret my mistakes? I shouldn't. Because these mistakes are sort of blessings in disguise. But... I can't help feeling blue for that....

Things have been hectic this week, but overall I must say, there are many things I have before me... Things to look ahead to.... There's no room or time to look back, whine and get stuck... Move on XT.... *sigh*

Humbug....

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue.

A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

A snail can sleep for three years.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

Butterflies taste with their feet.

Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds. Dogs only have about 10.

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right.

The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.

The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).

There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and

Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest itself.

New Year

Continuation of the attack of the pink... I just bidded for a pink ipod on ebay. I'm mad, yes, that's what doing SOW til this time of the nite does to one, it wipes out any form of sanity...

1st Jan started out with... no boom... no fireworks... felt really crappy by the time evening hits. did silly things like doing up my 2005 online calender... trying to nap... setting up my webcam (which still doesn't work.. *grumbles*).. just refusing to do wat is urgent.. my SOW and the like. lol. Thankfully, managed to get out at nite w EC n thamps. great to catch up before we all start going MIA hidden under piles of... watever... lol

1st Jan has past. I still have no new year resolution(s). I have slight inkling wat i wanna do in the long term after teaching, but cant see the way. After today, talking to thamps fren, i felt more hopeful. :) still no resolution, but at least a bitta direction. that's good i hope.

tink i can get up for church later? hmm... need another miracle like on the 26th. tis time, a bigger one.

current state: insane

PINK ATTACK!!!!!

I have no idea wat's gotten into me!! Suddenly I'm crazy about pink!!! I've just changed my online calender's color setting as well as my msn's windows' colors to PINK!!! PASTEL & SWEET PINK!!! If I am hardworking enough, i'd soon change my blogger settings to pink too.... wats come over me... gosh!