moving on....

finally... the sch has 'released' me....

its been a tough week since mon... hving to speak to figures of authority... and things did not go as i intended... someone revealed my plans somewhat prematurely, the pple whom i'd like to inform personally got wind of my decision before i spoke. it wasn't ideal. but the LORD is in control.

negotiations started taking place... i was sort of asked to 'justify' my decision... which did not seem to satisfy the pple... i was 'questioned' to the point when i started to doubt my own decision.. i started to doubt if that was really what GOd is revealing...

it wasn't an easy period... when i thot things were 'settled' on mon, new stuff cropped up on wed... it was discouraging... but on hindsight, the matter that cropped up on wed... was the one that allowed the full release... God has the best plan... and He's showing it by revealing bit by bit. if nuthin happened on wed, den i'd hv to make do with the 'second-best' based on the talks on mon. if only we have faith... the faith journey is slowly but evidently unfolding as i start to take the first step. when i worry how i shld speak with wisdom, He has oredi 'fought the batter for me' and paved the way. I previously questioned if I was on the right track.. this was a sign that... yup....

PJ asked wat my emotions are the moment i got the news tt i was 'released'. first... FREEDOM... den... almost immediately the feeling tt followed was a sense of loss as well.. it is official. it is confirmed. there's no turning back. i'd be packing my table real soon... putting away all that i've gathered... the experiences, the accomplishments, the possibilities in this place, the security...

but i wan to learn to trust in Him. He has shown Himself to be faithful so evidently even when i had so little faith. Yest, i wondered how i cld get thro this... and tis morn.. i din even hv to do much... except to pray.. not that i 'felt strong faith'... but He is faithful...

moving on....